“Just as there are people to whom you owe a great deal, it’s your duty to go to them, thank them, and show your gratitude and acknowledgment of their favor. Similarly, there are things, events, and emotions to which you owe thanks, foremost among them your sorrows. Sorrows are the primary soldiers that liberate us from excessively idolizing people and things. One of the most important moments of freedom is the liberation from idolizing life.
‘Everything upon it [the earth] is perishing.’ Once, our Mentor went through a hardship, so I asked him, ‘What did you learn, my master?’ He said, ‘I learned that nothing lasts forever.’ And by the way, this is a very valuable lesson because clinging too tightly to the details of this world is one of the secrets of distress. Every time you acquire something, there’s great joy, and every time you lose something, there’s intense sorrow. Why is that? Why does one become like a child who gets a piece of candy and becomes extremely happy, or if it’s taken away, cries bitterly?
This is a childhood devoid of maturity. The most beautiful thing is for your joys to be great but mature. We are in this world, not in paradise, and your sorrows should also be mature. Everything passes, so sorrows come as soldiers of God to remind you that money comes and goes, people can change, their hearts can harden, and a position is a day of celebration and joy at first, and in the end, a day of sadness. Do you know why? Why shouldn’t you get too attached?
Sorrows come so that you don’t get overly attached. The only complete attachment should be to the Eternal, the Almighty God, who does not change or alter, who does not stop giving, does not tire of supplication, and does not disappoint hope. Everything is perishing except ِAllah . The favor is that you learn this meaning. The complete attachment to God. Sorrows come for this reason, so your Lord explains your state in the Quran:
‘In the name of God, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. No disaster strikes upon the earth or among yourselves except that it is in a record before We bring it into being – indeed that, for Allah, is easy – so that you will not despair over what has eluded you and not exult [in pride] over what He has given you. And Allah does not like everyone self-deluded and boastful.’
So sorrows come to remove from a person the constant panic, meaning the exaggerated emotions that are not mature, the happiness that controls you. And the solution comes in the Quran so that sorrows don’t break you. Be thankful for them because they taught you a great meaning, which is the complete attachment only to God. Everything is like ‘In the name of God, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Indeed, mankind was created anxious: When evil touches him, impatient, and when good touches him, withholding [of it], except the prayerful.’
There’s two ways to find solace and strength in life, especially during times of sorrow or loss:
Constant Connection with the Divine: This part emphasizes the importance of maintaining a strong, ongoing spiritual connection with God (referred to as the Eternal, the Almighty). By doing so, you are reminded that you’re never alone, and this divine support system provides resilience against life’s hardships. It suggests that while the loss of loved ones or facing difficulties can be painful, these experiences don’t have to lead to despair. The presence and support of God can offer strength and perspective, reminding you that life’s journey continues and that every ending is part of a larger, divine plan.
Generosity and Sharing: The second solution focuses on the concept of generosity, not just in terms of financial giving but in a broader sense. It interprets ‘wealth’ as not only monetary riches but also as anything that is valuable to you, which your soul is drawn to. This could include your time, attention, love, skills, or resources. The verse ‘And those within whose wealth is a known right for the petitioner and the deprived’ highlights the idea that part of what you possess is meant to be shared with others, especially those in need. This act of giving and sharing is seen as a way to manage attachment to material or worldly things, fostering a sense of detachment and inner peace. By willingly sharing what you love or value, you exercise control over your attachments, making the inevitable losses in life more bearable and infusing your life with a sense of purpose and interconnectedness with others.
Get used to giving from it, get used to being independent of it or a part of it, so that your decision is always in your hands. I own or do not own. So if you lose something, you are accustomed to loss by your will. Be thankful for your sorrows that taught you all this, that complete attachment should only be to the Eternal, the Almighty. So, God is the reliever of every distressed soul and calms our hearts, O our Master, until certainty comes to us.”
